I have just bought an iPhone (8gb version), and not too sure whether I should be feeling excited and proud, or just plain dirty.

It is almost as if I have covered myself in my own excretment, grinning happily as I repeat my name in a sing song voice.
And now that I have bitten from the Forbidden Fruit, can I expect little black silhouette demons to sit on my shoulders whispering Apple slogans into my ear, while Steve Jobs sits in his frozen circle laughing maniacally as I thrash about, white cables holding me down as I scream unbelievingly ‘I only bought it for the apps…!”?

Maybe…

In the meantime, the Devil’s Whore sits on my desk at work staring blankly at me, knowing I can’t do anything with It until It has called home with the vile and soul destroying iTunes.

Is this the beginning of the end…